Comment on How do you refer to the lgbtq+ "community" least excludingly?

• AmidFuror@kbin.social ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  What about saying quee without the hard 'r'?

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  • Taleya@aussie.zone ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Lmao i fucking love you

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• growsomethinggood@reddthat.com ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I think there are ways OP can use queer respectfully, and there are ways they may accidentally slip into something that can sound homophobic, so, tread with caution. “The queer community” is fine, that reads to me with the same respect as “queer theory” in an academic setting. “The queers” =homophobic (unless you are part of that community and are being ironic), “are you queer?” =also bad, “my queer colleague” =not good unless that is the specific label they identify with, etc.

  Alphabet mafia is best left to the Gen Z kids on TikTok, even as one of them queers myself I’d never use that in a serious setting.

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  • Taleya@aussie.zone ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    They do have options though - lgbt, lgbtqa, lgbtqa+, even ‘gay community’ are all widely used .

    Although i saw an auto-transcriber turn lgbtqa into 'legittabittaque-ah" once, which i feel we all desperately need to add to our lexicon.

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• BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  It seems that people disagree with you, based on your votes. I don’t get it, I am an outsider, I’m going to stay an outsider. No matter how many black friends I had, I would never consider using the N-word either, because I’m not black, I’m not a member of the community, and I don’t know how it is to live your life under those circumstances.

  So as OP I can honestly say that I’m not really considering “queer”. One thing, as I’ve already ranted above, is that an English context its history is in a derogatory usage, and shaking that past is difficult, and impossible for me to comfortably pull off. But in a Danish context the word makes no sense. “Trans” and the various permutations of the letters are used in Danish, but “queer” never has been. I believe the closest word would be “bøsse”, but that is strictly used to describe homosexual men.

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  • Taleya@aussie.zone ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Eh, it’s the internet, we’re talking about queer matters and I intimated there may be something the cishet can’t have. I wouldn’t read into the downvotes lol.

    Identifying as Queer or using the word Queer can even be contentious among certain circles within the community itself these days, depending on your generation and terf/tumblr exposure. i wouldn’t stick my foot in that beartrap if I were in your shoes. Generally referring to it as The Community is good though.

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• Mesophar@lemm.ee ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I find that take very problematic. Not because of your opinion on who can or cannot use words like queer, but because you aren’t giving a meaningful alternative. What language should an ally use to avoid stepping on someone’s toes?

  Personally, I think intent is very important in this sort of context, so I don’t see issue with words like queer when used earnestly in support. Though I know my experience isn’t universal, and I think OP sees that and is trying to be mindful.

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  • Taleya@aussie.zone ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    They do have options though - lgbt, lgbtqa, lgbtqa+, even ‘gay community’ are all widely used .

    Although i saw an auto-transcriber turn lgbtqa into 'legittabittaque-ah" once, which i feel we all desperately need to add to our lexicon.

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    • Mesophar@lemm.ee ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Perfect! I assumed those were the alternatives you’d meant, but without saying them I wasn’t sure.

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