Comment on do you apologize, even if it's not your fault just to make the other person feel validated?
naught101@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Yes… Apologies aren’t about fault for me. They are about recognising other’s suffering, and possibly about acknowledging my contribution to that situation.
The apology isn’t about you, it’s about the other person, and showing you care about them.
It can be problematic when there’s no established actual violation and you simply go along with whoever is doing the demanding…
People who demand apologies are seldom the type who actually deserve apologies. Discernment is quite necessary here, if you apologize unduly, you are setting a pattern that helps establish the response they expect even when they act unreasonably or uncivilly.
Yeah, I’m definitely assuming good faith above. I’m lucky that I’m mostly surrounded by people for whom that assumption makes sense.
This upsets me and I demand an apology.
I get that this is a joke, but there’s a good point there too: I don’t give apologies because they were demanded, if give them because I can see that they’d help improve the situation.
But improvement is subjective; what if it does improve @spankmonkey@lemmy.world’s situation?
Then I’ll do it. If it doesn’t cost me too much. I can’t see someone else’s perspective really, but I can at least be empathetic…
Kalladblog@lemmy.world 7 months ago
I tend to disagree (to a degree, (lel)). An apology is also a sign of regret of a previous action imo.
naught101@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Yeah, that’s always gotta be true to some extent… If not, then the apology is gonna be insincere anyway. But it doesn’t mean that the regret has to be massive for you for the apology to be valid or useful.