Comment on [deleted]

GreenKnight23@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

• dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  This is a life at stake. Don’t tell this guy to be a pushover to spare a feeling. It’s way WAY worse to fuck a whole life thinking you’ve got a career that your parents know something about when you DONT.

  This is a shitty, entitled take. Some people are good at some things. Some are good at others. Don’t gaslight your kid to think he’s an astronaut and let the world teach a lesson. That makes you a SHIT parent.

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  • lud@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

    Life at stake?

    Eh no, not knowing that you should have a backup plan if you want to do stuff like football is far from ruining a whole life.

    Let’s say that they figure out that football is a no go at 25 or something ridiculous like that, what happens? Nothing. They can just do something else, they can even study and get some good education if they want. Switching careers isn’t impossible like you make it out to be. Hell, depending on where you live you might even get paid by the government to get a better education.

    Let the kid do football but encourage them to do other stuff too (like getting a good education).

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  • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

    [deleted]

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    • someguy3@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

      Guy says to not tear down people. Then tears down people.

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• sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  I didn’t have this life trajectory, but I have another experience and don’t really agree with this. My parents have always been loving and supporting of me. They saw me majoring in science and encouraged me. Once or twice my dad told me he thought I’d be a good audio engineer, but I never really took him seriously.

  Well I probably wasn’t cut out to be a STEM worker, or at least I haven’t figured it out yet and I’m getting pretty old. Just working dead end jobs and being too anxious to try for better jobs.

  Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I listened to my dad a little better, or if anyone had been able to tell me while I was struggling in my stem classes, that maybe I was aiming at the wrong thing, and to keep looking…

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  • Fetus@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

    I’m sorry, but the irony of not becoming an audio engineer because you didn’t listen is really something.

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    • sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

      Hehe that is pretty funny thanks for that :p

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  • orcrist@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

    There’s no way your dad could have known what was going to happen. There’s no way people around you could have known that you were in a career path that wasn’t going to work out well for you. Nobody can guarantee the future like that.

    The other thing is that even if you’re working in STEM, to follow up with your example, there are thousands of different jobs that all feel totally different to people working them. It’s quite possible that you could initially hate the field, then make some lateral shift, and find a position that is halfway decent. Here again, nobody knows what’s going to be good for you.

    If you want responsible career advice, it’s quite simple. Because there aren’t guarantees, you might want to develop several different skill sets, so that you’re in a better position to deal with unknown future changes. If you think you can learn how to do one simple thing and then have 45 years of happiness doing it, flip a coin and hope luck is on your side.

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• acutfjg@feddit.nl ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  Generalized animosity from a parent to their child is the not the same as seeing a niche interest that most likely won’t work out based on facts.

  You’re giving survivorship bias for two completely different situations. He’s not telling his kid he can’t do anything. He’s being very specific, and that specific thing is also already very difficult to obtain for anybody, let alone those with great skills.

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  • libra00@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

    And you’re saying the lessons from one thing aren’t directly applicable to the other when they are. It’s like saying no one who was ever physically abused as a child can ever talk about why hitting a child is bad because they’re just giving survivorship bias for two completely different situations. The lack of belief still hurts whether it’s an isolated incident or a pattern, and OP needs to know that.

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    • acutfjg@feddit.nl ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

      You’re right I am saying it’s not directly applicable.

      You can use parts of it to make an example, but that’s not what they did. They basically said you’ve ruined the relationship because that what they experienced their whole like till they met their partner.

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