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Comment on EE warns parents against giving children under 11 a smartphone

I will argue smartphones or any electronic is not the problem. The problem is lazy parents.

My kids all have had phones since before 10 and they’re all well adjusted but to be clear I monitor their usage and I check in with my kids regularly.

I cannot hold back society or technology at the fear of my kids being left behind. What I can do is help them navigate both as they grow.

I love how quick we are to lay the blame anywhere but parents.

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padge@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I strongly believe that a large part of the reason China is so strict with underage phone and game restrictions is because the parents are at work for too long to do any real parenting. Ideally parents should be the ones making those choices and actually monitoring their kids, but since I don’t have kids I can’t really say for myself.

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- TwinTusks@bitforged.space ⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  
  the parents are at work for too long to do any real parenting
  
  This 100%.
  
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- Emerald@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  I’m always sus of anything the Chinese government does. I feel that governments restricting Internet usage is just a way to indoctrinate them into only the media you (the state) shows them
  
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todd_bonzalez@lemm.ee ⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
The problem here is that the systems you have to monitor usage aren’t great, and kids are known for lying or omitting details to their parents.

Giving kids open-ended access to technology doesn’t have to involve giving them access to the Internet without constant guidance. I would rather my kid have less digital access than her peers, than get sexually exploited because they were a child publicly online.

More and more I am seeing that the places kids go online are places I don’t fully understand, but a cursory review reveals is also a hotspot for sexual predators. This seems like the perfect place for a predator to stalk my child. I don’t know enough to stop them, and my kid doesn’t know enough not to get exploited. By the time I find out about it, it’ll probably be too late.

Giving a child an internet-connected camera and screen can become such a horrific nightmare, I think that good parenting actually has to involve being realistic and telling your kids “just because your friends have TikTok and Instagram doesn’t mean you won’t get grounded for it in this house”, and letting kids use technology when I am in the room with them. I have seen what kids are posting online, and it’s easy to assume that their parents don’t care, but it’s a lot more realistic to accept that kids are good at keeping secrets, and their parents don’t know what they’re up to.

If they want to learn about computers on their own, I’ll buy them what they need to learn about all sorts of stuff that doesn’t expose them directly to capitalist or sexual exploitation online. When they are old enough to defend themselves, then they can be given the trust in accessing the Internet on their own, but until then they need to explore under my watchful eye.

Giving a smartphone to a <10 year old child, and trusting that the limited monitoring tools available, and your child’s honesty is enough to keep them safe from vicious exploitation is delusional and irresponsible.

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- whoisearth@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  This is an extremely reactionary take. I hear what you are saying but I draw the line as delusional and irresponsible unless you apply that to pretty much all parents that don’t completely smother their children.
  
  We make mistakes as we grow. We lie. We get hurt. Technology is always Pandora’s box. I’d argue we have better knowledge of our kids now than we ever used to and stats show the world is safer now than it has ever been.
  
  If you live in fear you will form your decisions from a place of fear.
  
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  - todd_bonzalez@lemm.ee ⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    
    This is an extremely reactionary take.
    
    How the fuck is this Reactionary?
    
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    whoisearth@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    Ah yes. A phone is a car. Got it.
    
    Also, who tf is exploiting kids because they have a phone? Do you also remove all TVs from your house? What about the radio? Can’t have Lady Gaga singing about “poke her face” to my kids! Lol
    
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- deathbird@mander.xyz ⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  This is actually a good take. Kids aren’t miniature adults, they’re kids. They’re not helpless or useless, but neither are they fully morally and emotionally developed. They need guidance. Plenty of adults can’t responsibly handle internet access. I survived early onilne porn and gore and social media, but it’s not like any of it benefited me in a meaningful way.
  
  Some folks have an attitude that’s like “I touched hot stoves and I learned better”, but that’s far from ideal.
  
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