Comment on I've heard it clears up again after the first wave of divorces
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 5 weeks agowhat i don’t get is why people married people they knew were awful people, or awful for them.
anytime someone lies, cheats, or steals from me (or shows any disrespect, like verbal/physical abuse) i dump their ass.
RBWells@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
My ex was a chill stoner with a good work ethic when we got together and we had many good years, then he lost job after job, stopped looking, got radicalized reading Stormfront, then eventually physically abusive. I could not convince him to seek help, since he got so paranoid.
People change, sometimes you change in opposing directions.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
that isn’t change, that’s failure to take responsibility for yourself.
RBWells@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Well it was a change, but I don’t disagree. Instead of trying, he just looked for someone to blame. It’s not like there aren’t external forces but our own actions and thoughts are what we can control, and can make a big difference. He’s doing better now, too late for us but he’s working, paid child support, stopped drinking, still a racist fuck but realized he was his biggest problem and did work on himself.