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Comment on It’s true, Kelly Wilkinson was cop shopping. She was looking for a Queensland cop who cared | Lucy Clark

Women are the victims so the system obviously hates women and women have all the answers is such a braindead take.

Children are also the victims; should we be asking them to solve this problem? Does the system hate children?

The problem is with men, with a system and society that treats men like shit at their lowest points in life and is constantly shocked when those men lash out.

I say this as a survivor of domestic abuse so severe that it would horrify you. As a child I didn’t have any answers because I wasn’t equipped to even understand the source of the problem.

Should the police have gotten off their asses and done their jobs to prevent this woman’s death? Absolutely and NOTHING absolves the police of this failing.

Police also failed to stop what my father was doing. It was a court appointed psychologist and doctors who finally listened to him that changed his behaviour.

Men need help. Helping men will make everyone safer.

Help men and they WILL be better, this is a demonstrable fact based on violence declining with social safety nets and resources for men.

Also fuck the police. ACAB and you can bank on at least one of those cops she asked for help being a wife beating POS.

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Kachilde@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
So, women and children are the most common victims of domestic abuse. Your solution to this is to coddle the men who beat, abuse, and murder their families? Because they have been “treated like shit”? If a fox keeps killing my chickens, I’m not going to ask the fox for advice on how to protect the coop.

Buddy, EVERYBODY is treated like shit by society these days. But most of us don’t take it out on our families and loved ones. 99% of us feel let down by the system, yet manage to not tie our partners to clotheslines and set them on fucking fire.

The absolute shitstains that can’t wrap their head around the idea that their pain doesn’t give them the right to hurt and kill the people that depend on them deserve no word on the matter of domestic abuse. Fuck them.

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- bane_killgrind@kbin.social ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  I don't think they mean coddle, they mean treat the underlying mentality.
  
  Like, get them to wrap their head around it.
  
  Yeah you are right, everybody gets the short end of the stick. If a women is the abuser she just has less options to do damage.
  
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- Cypher@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  Those are some nice constructive solutions based on evidence you’ve provided, thank you for the contribution.
  
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  - wscholermann@aussie.zone ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    I’m sorry but the level of violence in this article goes beyond just someone losing their temper because of life circumstances . These were actions, and suggests to me a psychopath beyond reform.
    
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    unionagainstdhmo@aussie.zone ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    I think what @Cypher@lemmy.world was getting at was that we need to help people, especially men, to prevent them from becoming “a psychopath beyond reform”. Simply put, addressing the upstream problem
    
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    Cypher@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    The violence goes well beyond what you believe can be caused by life circumstances.
    
    There is a lot of evidence that “normal” people can do horrific things.
    
    Your refusal to believe that a person could do this, and not just some monster, says a lot about your life. You should be thankful for that.
    
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Spuddlesv2@lemmy.ca ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
What the reddit is this shit.

Firstly the article doesn’t say that.

Cops are mostly men and yeah they fucken do hate women. The stats back that up. So changing the “system” (ie the way police forces deal with abuse to get more women involved and in positions of power) is absolutely a brilliant idea. Cops also (statistically) hate their kids so it’s a double whammy.

Pieces of shit that beat their partners and children don’t get a pass because no one gave them a sympathetic pat on the hand and a cuppa. Very few people alive today believe it is acceptable to beat their spouse and kids. They do it because they can, and because they get away with it.

If the court appointed a psychologist to your father then the system DID help him. Too late, obviously, but that suggests to me the issue was with the (almost certainly male) cops not stepping in sooner to get the court involved.

I’m sorry you suffered abuse as a child and I hope your life has been safe and full of love since then.

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- Cypher@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  
  What the reddit is this shit.
  
  Go over to the cesspool and check the thread, nothing there is as high quality as my comment here. They are literally all fixated on one of three things, ACAB, “so horrific my feels” and “im an abuse victim rant”.
  
  No solutions. No suggestions. No understanding of the root cause.
  
  Firstly the article doesn’t say that.
  
  No it is heavily implied that only women can solve this through such suggestions as women’s only police stations, staffed only by women.
  
  This is treating a symptom and not addressing the root cause; which allows more people to become victims in the first place instead of preventing offenders from existing. Do you hope for new drugs to treat cancer symptoms or do you want cancer cures? Both are great, one is better.
  
  Pieces of shit that beat their partners and children
  
  PEOPLE that beat their partners and children don’t wake up one day wanting to be awful humans. Dehumanising offenders at every opportunity because of emotional reactions, which are understandable but not necessarily helpful, only prevents treating the root causes of the offending.
  
  Truly broken people are extremely rare, most people are the results of their circumstances. Yes there are and always will be exceptions. Exceptions so rare they might be once in a generation.
  
  If the court appointed a psychologist to your father then the system DID help him.
  
  I do not like going into details but this was after 18 years, and only after we nearly killed each other. Cops ignored everything until the point that two people were hospitalised and ignoring it was no longer legally possible for them, and even then the useless bastards tried to put blame on me.
  
  (almost certainly male) cops
  
  Female cops were involved, from some of the earliest instances of abuse. Cops are cops. More cops won’t help. Governments everywhere have tried more cops. It never works. There’s some saying about doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results isn’t there?
  
  I have a genuine question on a topic that’s more related than most realise. Do you think sustance abuse issues should be treated as a health issue or as a criminal matter?
  
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  - Spuddlesv2@lemmy.ca ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    I shouldn’t have used your specific circumstance as an example and I apologise for that. I have absolutely no idea what you’ve been through and shouldn’t ever have made assumptions or attempted to use it to try to make my point.
    
    More women would definitely help. Cop culture is massively macho, male dominated, even if there are some women in some positions of power.
    
    Someone who decides to hit their spouse or child is a piece of shit. Someone who hurts any other innocent person intentionally is a piece of shit. Drug dealers are pieces of shit. The list is endless.
    
    If someone with a drug dependence hurts another person while intoxicated then that’s a criminal matter. Part of their sentence would undoubtedly be rehabilitation, as it should.
    
    If someone hurts another person then that’s a criminal matter. Part of their sentence would undoubtedly be rehabilitation.
    
    If someone hurts a spouse or child… etc.
    
    I don’t think singling out one group of criminals for special treatment is the answer.
    
    No one wakes up one day and decides to be an awful human, for sure. It takes time and practise, and people around them ignoring it or even enabling it.
    
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    Cypher@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    The point is to deal with mens issues before they’re hurting others.
    
    Yes there should be other solutions should prevention fail, yet the focus should remain on prevention to minimise harm to the greatest number of people.
    
    Prevention is the best strategy for literally everyone.
    
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maniacalmanicmania@aussie.zone ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

Women are the victims so the system obviously hates women and women have all the answers is such a braindead take.

The article doesn’t really say this though.

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- Cypher@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  Read between the lines a little when one of the suggestions is women only police stations staffed exclusively with women.
  
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  - maniacalmanicmania@aussie.zone ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    What’s wrong with that?
    
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    Cypher@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    It does nothing to address the root cause, it only seeks to treat a symptom.
    
    Also when was the last time that more police solved a problem like domestic violence?
    
    The stock market has more impact on DV than police numbers do. Trying to solve a problem with a solution that you know doesn’t work is just insane.
    
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