This reminds me, have your ever thought about how Jesus definitely masturbated or if he didn’t he at least had wet dreams?

The shroud of Turin managed to keep it’s shape because it was Jesus cum rag, it’s basically paper mâche.

Now you might say “but touchmacaque, that’s blasphemy!” But I’d like to counter with the fact that we’ve all made our own cum paper mâche just like our Lord and saviour, in a way were just following Jesus.