Comment on Finding people who vibe with you is so hard
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 7 hours agoYeah, I agree it’s really social media shit.
I had no problems socializing 10-20 years ago. Now it’s incredibly difficult because people don’t really want to socialize anymore so much as be validated incessantly. It’s warped people’s brains to think any minor discomfort is this horrible thing, and anyone who disagrees with you is a raging asshole.
In my college days I used to like being around people who disagreed with me and talking about those disagreements. That is how I made most of my friends Now that is all but impossible. The second you disagree now, no matter how trivial, people demonize you and start saying crazy over the top conclusions about how evil and awful you are.
Literally, I’ve had many of my dates the past few years scream at me what a racist piece of shit I am for the books I read, and also for the books I don’t read. Mostly because I read classics and to people’s mind anyone author born before 1970 is a racist piece of shit or something. I do not understand how people have normalized this insanity.
FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
It’s true.
I’m lucky to have a lot of friends via the roller derby community, but I’m a white man in a largely liberal and activist community, so my mantra whenever any controversial topic comes up is: “I don’t feel it’s my place to speak on that” or “I don’t know enough to have an opinion on that”. (Which in a lot of cases is probably true.)
Those friends end up being surface-level in a lot of ways because I love the sport and can’t risk accidentally saying something that offends someone and risk losing my access to it, because if you say the wrong thing, malice is always assumed and there’s simply no grace given for error.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
that’s exactly why i left my communities/hobby activities. I can’t live my life that way. It’s miserable being around miserable people who want to be offended by everything.
FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
It can be like that for sure. I accidentally called a trans skater ‘she’ three years ago, and they got over it and understood it was a mistake, but one of the refs in the league still won’t talk to me. So petty and stupid how people can be.
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
honestly, i have had the SAME experience. the trans people are way more chill than the non-trans people who think they are ‘fighting’ on behave of trans people.