To be fair, having recently been on the market for a proper vibrating sex toy, they’re expensive as fuck, and according to my ex-wife (ow. ex- still stings.) capable of providing mind-blowing orgasms. So yeah, for those without a budget, we make do with what we got, or the bargain bin at Good Vibes.

TMI:

spoiler

The item in question doesn’t figure into why she’s ex- now, but the reason we were on the market for one absolutely does. I’ll be talking to an endocrinologist at the end of the year.