I’m with Photuris, it’s a much more complicated game than you might expect, and they’ve been playing it their whole lives.
Rule #1 is to preserve your image at all times. Which means not flipping out in public.
Rule #2 is that everything is someone else’s fault. Which means if you call them out in public, they will cry and ask why you are so mean to them. Instant sympathy, and you look like the asshole, and assuming you yourself are not a narcissist, you’ll probably feel like an asshole too.
Most likely, if they really are a narcissist, you’ll try your test, think they aren’t, and look really bad in front of everyone.
Photuris@lemmy.ml 21 hours ago
Careful. Skillful Narcissists can be quite adept at keeping their cool in public (to maintain their positive public image) while simultaneously planning their complete and total revenge on you - smear campaign, sabotaging relationships, setting up traps, lobbing false accusations, messing with your employment, messing with your spouse, vexatious lawsuits, the works.
If you play with a Narcissist, be prepared to go ALL THE WAY when you dance with them. Complete and total WARFARE.
Really, unless you have some compelling reason to do so, the only winning move is not to play.
TranquilTurbulence@lemmy.zip 11 hours ago
Hmm… That is a good point. Seems like a risky experiment.
The idea with this test setup is based on the idea that the result could potentially provide new information instead of just confirming what I already believe to be true. An inferior experiment would just involve mild flattery, but that can only result in confirmation bias instead of rejecting a hypothesis. Not my favorite type of experiment.
I guess and observational approach is the way to go in this case.
swelter_spark@reddthat.com 15 hours ago
Of course, not playing can also be something they view as hostile.
whaleross@lemmy.world 8 hours ago
Grey rocking is the best strategy to get rid of all annoying people. Do not engage, do not give them any fuel, do not give them any satisfaction. Be as boring and unexciting as you can possibly be until they lose interest in you.
Photuris@lemmy.ml 5 hours ago
Yep. They’ll sometimes flare up at first, trying to get a rise out of you; but keep steady with grey rock, remain disinterested and disengaged, and they will move on to other targets. It usually doesn’t take long.