Comment on Mr. fatass and his fat ass

lonefighter@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

• HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

  “girl you gotta lose some weight or one of these days when you pounce on my crotch from on top of the bookcase I’m gonna rupture”

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  • MutilationWave@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

    I’ve got three little vicious bastards and one very large one. The 3am rip ass through the house and across my body is not the fun part of having these boys. Many times straight to the crotch.

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    • lonefighter@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

      A few years ago I had small unexplained tender bruises on my chest and arms that would not heal for several months, long enough that I was beginning to get a little concerned (is it cancer?).

      One night I was lying awake at 3am when one of my cats chased the other into my bedroom and onto my bed. 4 paws came flying onto me, perfectly landing on each tender bruise before launching back off of me, then the other cat landed on me with his paws in the same spots before jumping off in chase of his furry friend.

      Mystery solved, and that’s how I figured out just how heavy of a sleeper I am. My cats had been using my sleeping body as a launchpad for months and I was none the wiser until I happened to be awake.

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      • MutilationWave@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        I thought I was a heavy sleeper. I once slept through a mild hurricane but you’re on another level.

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      • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago

        You know what, I get random paw sized bruises on my arms and I think you just solved that mystery

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