Yeah - I wish more folks understood what the experience is like. It’s like my brain lights on fire. I get angry, extremely angry and can be verbally really aggressive. If I’m alone, I can usually self regulate, but when I’m around others it’s much harder.

It’s been a struggle as I work to get this facility shut down. When I’m calling state agencies to get my torturer’s facility investigated, the second that I can pick up that they don’t believe, or if they minimize my experience - it ratchets me into a world of pure anger and panic.

I knocked over a container earlier and it made a loud sound as it landed on the ground - it made me angry. Embarrassingly ridiculously angry. It’s stupid, but I had the urge to throw the thing at the wall! I wanted to cuss it out! It’s an inanimate object, it didn’t break, I just needed to pick it up and put the pencils back in. It wasn’t a big deal. But in that split second where I went to that lizard brain, I was furious!