Tujio

@Tujio@lemmy.world

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Mellencamp was right: "Life goes on...long after the thrill of livin' is gone."⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  A buddy of mine is a wine steward. He quit smoking and said “Holy shit I can taste wine again. I’ve just been making it up for years!”

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨How long do you think we'll keep seeing "formerly Twitter"?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I think it might be this. A lot of traditional media outlets are mad about twitter becoming such a necessity for them. The old guard is mad that they have to cater to this bullshit online platform. The new guard is mad at the fact that the best outlet for breaking online news is suddenly owned and operated by a fascist.

  All of them want to say that x is bullshit, but they don’t want to actually lose the clicks/ market share that comes with it. So they keep passive-aggressively calling it twitter.

  Drunkenly thinking about it, this is kinda like calling a trans person by their dead name. Except it’s insulting a shitty company led by a shithead, so I’m cool with it.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨If Biden wanted to could he have people kill Trump since he is in office and SCOTUS said it was ok?⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I have met many, many school teachers in my adult life and the vast majority of them are lovely people. There has only been one who I’d describe as a psychopath.

  Alcoholics? Absolutely. It’s a toss-up between teachers, lawyers and nurses for the hardest-drinking group of motherfuckers I’ve ever known.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨The 42 year old new hire at your job confesses to you that he has had 48 different jobs in his life. What is your opinion on that?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  If I’m a coworker in this situation I don’t care. If I’m a manager in this situation I just don’t bother training them on anything but the basics for the job.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I don’t want to have a conversation while my dick is in my hand.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨If people from the US love the imperial system so much, why are their musicians using metronomes instead of footonomes?⁩ ⁨⁨6⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Ever listen to Meshuggah?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Peanut butter and hummus are the same thing.⁩ ⁨⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  You know the difference between chickpeas and garbanzo beans?

  I’ve never paid to have a garbanzo bean on my face.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Assuming a button that, every time you push it, your intelligence goes up. The obvious and sane thing to do is to push the button all day. Yes? No? Maybe? Is there something that I'm missing here?⁩ ⁨⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I’ll always remember a story my buddy told me in high school. His dad was a judge, and absolutely brilliant, and a major alcoholic. One time his dad sat him down and said ‘I think you’ll have a good life. Because you’re smart enough to do well in this world, but not smart enough to realize what a shithole it is.’

  I really think that there is a point where if you’re smart enough, you have brain power to really pay attention to everything that goes on in the world. And paying attention to all of that can do serious harm to one’s psyche.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Do scrota have the same wrinkle pattern every time they get cold?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago⁩:

  Scrotapodes.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago⁩:

  I meant soon.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Lisp⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago⁩:

  Same thing with the guy who named it ‘dyslexia.’