Comment on How can a ugly and short guy compensate for his looks?
amio@kbin.social 8 months ago
The reality is, you often can't. People will both intentionally and unintentionally judge you for both - it's often not even conscious - and lie to your face about it.
Quitmuch1938@lemmy.world 8 months ago
That is the only correct answer here. Thanks for honesty.
GoodStuffEh@lemmy.ca 8 months ago
Why would you ask a question if you already know the “correct answer”?
Quitmuch1938@lemmy.world 8 months ago
I didn’t know it until I saw it
GoodStuffEh@lemmy.ca 8 months ago
Why is that? You obviously have already made up your mind on the subject, seeing other answers. Were you simply seeking validation? I don’t take problem with that, but don’t outright reject the people who are providing genuine responses to your query. Given this is a largely anonymous platform, we have no context on what you actually look like, and you may very well be ugly enough that it has as big of an impact as you indicate it does. The advice being posted is valid for 99.9% of people, but you have to understand that we don’t know what you’re working with. On top of that, most of what is being said is also just good life advice to follow in general, even if it doesn’t get you a partner.
xmunk@sh.itjust.works 8 months ago
NoStupidQuestions doesn’t include “Let’s have a pity party to reinforce my own preconceived notions” - I met my spouse on a MUD (basically a text based multi-player role playing game). We formed a connection before we knew what the other person looked like or their gender (I’m pan so whatever in that regard).
The answer above is wrong, relationships built on appearance alone are doomed to be miserable… don’t buy into the pity party.
amio@kbin.social 8 months ago
I'm a cynical bastard though, based on my own experience. It is arguably not the only experience, so be aware of confirmation bias. That being said, in general, a lot of people seem to have an actual unwillingness to consider negative trends in society. If one doesn't want to believe society can be judgmental, it turns out it's very easy to ignore, deflect and rationalize people's negative experiences. That way one saves on empathy which is just a lot of work.