This was always my main issue back when I played Destiny 1. Pub groups take a lot of the fun out strikes and nightfalls. I’d imagine most people you’re queueing with are just farming things from stuff they’ve already run a bunch of times which is why they’re rushing through.

I never ended up finding a casuals clan that I meshed well with, but like other folks have said I think your best bet is going to be finding a good clan rather than any one single person. Your mileage will probably vary for this though, especially since it sounds like you’re looking for a 3rd who’s also new to the game. Including your general ages, time zone, and which platform you play on will also help you get better results.

I swore off Bungie games in general after they started the trend of sunsetting already paid DLC content in the first game, but I hope you find someone and have fun! Good luck!