Why does he have so much space? Stupid bastard has overcapitalised.

My first place when I moved out of home was a room where I had a couch, a single bed and a coffee table doe my computer.

Clean clothes at one end. Dirty in a garbage bag. Small passage between couch and bed to move back and forth to the door.

Leaves more money for acid, MDMA and nitrous.

Maybe leave the nitrous out of it OP. Being a nitrous fiend is bad.