Comment on YSK that Elena Kostyuchenko is an extraordinarily brave woman.

DeathByBigSad@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

• AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Be kind to yourself. Bravery is a skill like any other, and training it is similar to weight training — trying to force yourself to do too much all at once can cause yourself harm in your quest to grow bravery.

  People who are extremely brave have often developed that skill over an extended period, often due to the unfortunate circumstances of living under constant oppression. We hear about the large acts of bravery and boldness, but that kind of strength doesn’t just emerge spontaneously from nowhere. We don’t see the small acts of resistance and solidarity that enable people to grow into the kind of badass in the OP.

  There are opportunities for developing bravery in your daily life, if you let yourself be open to them. It can start with something as trivial as politely refusing to let someone cut in front of you in the supermarket queue, or saying “what a weird thing to say” when someone makes a problematic joke in a scenario where most people just uncomfortably laugh. If you try to psyche yourself up for a small act of bravery and then chicken out, don’t beat yourself up about it — knowing how to safely “fail a rep” (to continue the weightlifting metaphor) is a normal part of training this skill, and there will always be more opportunities to try again.

  The shame you’re feeling is because there’s a tension between the person you are now, and the person you’d like to be. When leveraged well, this can be a good thing. Don’t dwell too much on who you are now, but look towards the person you’d like to be. Don’t compare yourself to the peaks of bravery, but rather just consider what a version of you who is a tad more brave would be like; if you place too much distance between the person you’d like to be and who you are now, then the thread connecting those two versions of you will snap, and it will seem impossible to improve.

  Don’t try to be a hero — just try to be a little bit braver than you are right now, and keep trying. You might not recognise it as such, but I’d say that acknowledging the shame you feel is a small act of bravery. That’s a good starting step.

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  • 1984@lemmy.today ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Nice comment, some wisdom in that one!

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