Having kids makes drives the father figure template. It fuckin changes people. You might think someone shouldnt be a dad after them already being balls deep in kids but that same person before they had kids was so much less fatherly than the person you see today. No even saying for the better or worse or whatever. I just know from seeing it happen to most of my 50+ 1st cousins and 1st cousins once removed (kids of 1st cousins). Kids will not stop even when you are tapping out begging for mercy bargaining away anything you can to get them to just…chill. But they dont fuckin care. They do not have the capability of caring. So they do not fuckin stop. And im not saying adhd bouncing off the walls, im just saying at baby age it could be a touth coming in or ear aches and BAM father figure of the year has slept 3 hours in 3 days. Toddler… yeah ok even the best behaved toddler is still a walking talking monster with no concept of what will and will not hurt them. Then the kids only get smarter and more devious and more willing to challenge you when you are being fatherly.

There is nothing in the world that can mimic the toll being an actual father does to a person. The most fatherly father figures I can picture are the men who have made it to the finish li e that is grandkids. Its the best part of having kids.

But thats just my empirical 2 cents from growing up in a large family and made it past the ages of worrying I might become a father someday lol.