But that’s a me thing, something you would know if you knew me.

You’re not getting the point.

The point is, we don’t know you.

And this may shock you, but people with bad intentions can just lie about things online. I’m not saying you are some psychopath who acts nice and caring online only to spike a drink and rape in person. Or that you’re an abuser but you can’t catch it yourself. I’m saying people don’t know you, and therefore it can’t be ruled out as a possibility. And so therefore the risk does indeed exist.

Not knowing is the point. Some people will therefore want to take more precautions when getting to know you even better in person, to minimize the risk further. Others won’t think of the risk and just take it, or think it’s not too risky, or not care of the risk, or even might think they can keep themselves safe, and won’t meeting you in person alone in public.

No matter what though, the point is that initially, people don’t know you. It’s not an accusation directed at you, it’s literally just the situation.