So bad that I had to hop on a forum and go “Hey, so, there aren’t any good choices in the dialog tree, did I fuck up my character generation? Should I start over?”

Your first mistake was thinking it was like any of those other CRPGS with dialog trees. No, you didn’t fuck up your character generation. Your character is a fuck up. That’s part of the story it’s trying to tell.

How you engage with the game is figuring out how to un-fuck-up the character in a matter that is realistic. Or just ignoring whatever lessons the game gives you and continue down the same self-destructive path. Or somewhere in-between. All paths are have their creative stories to tell, and even being strange and weird with it can still lead to solving pieces of the crime you’re trying to piece together.

Yeah, I don’t get games where “You want some fuck?” is a valid dialog choice.

Because it’s fucking funny when you didn’t know what the actual dialogue entry was going to be, you took a gamble, and the “pay off” is that your character says the cringest fucking line to some woman he’s immediately attracted to. So cringe that even your own Volition (best fucking mental power, btw) is like “the words already left your mouth” as if he was already smacking his goddamn forehead right through to the other side.

Your. Character. Is. A. Fuck up.

If that bothers you, and you want to play something that involves some extreme power fantasy, where you can pick a class and play a completely silent blank slate, then this game is not for you.