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Comment on Why is the manosphere on the rise? UN Women sounds the alarm over online misogyny

Let’s try this again: If, as you say “women do empathy, men do resilience”, then why should childcare be 70:30? Why not 50:50 so the kids get taught empathy and resilience in equal measure? Then: How can you even be empathetic if you lack in the resilience department?

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Fedditor385@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago
Because more women than men want to be in daycare, it’s unrealistic to expect the same amount of men want to be in daycase as women. And the gender ratio of employees doesn’t mean thats also the ratio of what kids will take away from this. Does this mean that in daycare without any men the kids have only 50% of the care they need? Of course not.

Again, ONE DOESNT EXCLUDE THE OTHER. Everyone has empathy and resilience, but so far in general women tend to be better at empathy and men in resilience. Why force one to do both, when both can thrive in what they do better?

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- barsoap@lemm.ee ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  
  Because more women than men want to be in daycare it’s unrealistic to expect the same amount of men want to be in daycase as women.
  
  I don’t expect it. It is you who is insisting for no discernible reason that 70:30 is, and I quote, “ideal”. It is you who is saying “guys get some other job I don’t care how much you want the job and how good you’d be at it, we already have a quota of 30%”.
  
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  - Fedditor385@lemmy.world ⁨16⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    Did I say anywhere that the 30:70 means a really had 30:70 cap and that nobody after that is free to join or leave the job? Did I say that the 30% is exactly, not more not less, the amount of men who want to for ex. work in daycare?
    
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    barsoap@lemm.ee ⁨16⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    You said, verbatim:
    
    Childcare should ideally be 30% men and 70% women
    
    and then went on to justify it with
    
    because women are natual caretakers and excell at emotional and social tasks.
    
    implying that more men would mean worse results “because women are so much better at it”: If the ideal is 70:30 then everything else is worse, no? And you were also being very essentialist, saying that “women provide one thing, men another”.
    
    The trouble with childcare in Germany wasn’t absence of men as such – it was absence of male insight into childcare. Doing things in way that make a lot of sense but women aren’t as prone to do instinctively, but are very capable of doing. As long as there’s a baseline level of diversity such that both approaches are present, things are just fine. There’s no ideal ratio, there’s a wide span of equally good ratios that ensure that everything is covered.
    
    And btw you don’t teach emotional resilience by being authoritarian. You teach it by being there, hold watch, while the kid figures out how to control their emotions, maybe some gently encouraging words. Shouting at them might shock them into silence but it’s not going to teach them anything about actual emotional regulation. The very presence of the word “authority”, on top of that “strict authority”, in what you say betrays your ignorance about childcare. If you have kids I feel sorry for them.
    
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