Comment on [deleted]

nesc@lemmy.cafe ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

• gigachad@sh.itjust.works ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Honour killing is such a rare thing, I find what you are saying blatantly racist tbh. Do you know how many Muslims there are in the world?

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  • starlinguk@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    And yet, she is obviously afraid.

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  • nesc@lemmy.cafe ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’ve just stated that it’s a possibility, and at worst. These things really happen, if rarely, point was it’s better not to force an issue if other party is unwilling.

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• Stamets@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  At best, they will be upset

  At worst, they will murder

  Jesus fucking christ.

  First off, at worst, anyone is going to murder anyone. You clearly have never dated someone and met their father who was on the edge of murder.

  Second, at best they won’t be happy? So according to you, every single muslim hates their child dating someone who isn’t muslim and won’t be happy? Guess I better tell that to literally every muslim I’ve dated whose parents didn’t give a solitary shit and were actively supportive of their gay kid. Or my friends who’ve dated/married muslims and were accepted into the families while being Jewish or Atheist or Protestant.

  What is this racist garbage?

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  • AWistfulNihilist@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I don’t think anyone who mentions that honor killings are a thing is saying that. Honor killings have been recognized by amnesty international as being a distinct threat to women worldwide that is present in America as well specific to Muslim majority countries in the Middle East and Asia.

    I think any child has the potential of being killed by their angry parents, it’s happened very frequently from people of all backgrounds, but it’s ok to admit that a Muslim girl who doesn’t want to introduce you to her parents could be motivated by the fear of death or abuse in a very specific way. And i think it’s ok to tell this kid that this is a possible additional pressure based on her culture.

    But it’s fair to say this has happened like a half dozen times in the US in two decades. That might feel like a lot, but considering the sheer number of Muslims who live in this country, that might as not happen at all.

    I can keep both of these ideas in my head at the same time and not have a weird, knee-jerk meltdown in the comments!

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  • krawutzikaputzi@lemm.ee ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    The fact that the girlfriend doesn’t want to tell her family is kind of a hint that they won’t be happy about the relationship. So being upset is kind of the best outcome in this situation.

    It’s nice that you and also I have met nice muslims who encouraged their kids do love whoever they want. In this specific scenario I would trust the girlfriend though, because she knows her family better than us.

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    • Stamets@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Okay. Not sure what your comment has to do with me calling this dude out for being bigoted though. None of that is “permission” to be bigoted.

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  • nesc@lemmy.cafe ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    First, religion is not a race. Second, I’m from place where muslims (very secular ones at it) are significant minority. Third, I’ve been in the situation outlined, and heard of similar from people in this situation.

    Also there were at least two religiously minded honor killings that I know of one involved tatar (muslim) family, another cyhan (christian) family.

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    • Stamets@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      First, religion is not a race.

      Might want to educate yourself on what racism is because Islamophobia is considered a subset of racism. Source 1, Source 2, Source 3.

      Second, I’m from place where muslims (very secular ones at it) are significant minority.

      Which is irrelevant unless OP lives in the same area you’re from. You also did not clarify that and spoke about Muslims as a whole, you did not clarify level of secularity.

      Third, I’ve been in the situation outlined, and heard of similar from people in this situation.

      I doubt anecdotal evidence from you personally is reflective of reality in your area, nevermind world wide.

      Also there were at least two religiously minded honor killings that I know of one involved tatar (muslim) family, another cyhan (christian) family.

      And again, anecdotal evidence from your specific area. That isn’t reflective of reality and it is racist as shit for you to go “My experiences reflect reality as a whole.”

      So. I say again. What is this racist bullshit? Fuck off, dude.

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      • nesc@lemmy.cafe ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Sometime I forget that wrongthink is not allowed around lemmy. You are perfectly fine with giving right answer even if it can bring horrible result.

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  • TheLeadenSea@sh.itjust.works ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    What is this racist bullshit?

    Not engaging with any other part of your comment, but is Islam a race, now? I thought it was a religion.

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    • Stamets@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Islamophobia is considered a subset of racism.

      Source 1

      Source 2

      Source 3.

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      • crt0o@lemm.ee ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Race and religion are fundamentally different, one is a trait you’re born with that you have no control over, the other is a (potentially harmful) ideology, which you have the power to distance yourself from. I’m sick of this “you need to respect everyone’s religion” bullshit. No, I cannot respect an ideology which promotes stoning gays, and anyone who does is a moron.

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