Well, I think it’s of upmost importance to hire a private security firm to guard the bathrooms. Anyone entering or exiting those bathrooms will now be required to submit to a genital confirmation. We’ll have tighter security on those bathrooms than TSA guarding the airports from unauthorized water bottles, and 2 inch pocket knifes.

Because as we all know, urinating into a toilet, surrounded by makeshift stall walls, can be the most offensive thing in the world if you don’t share the same set of genitals as everyone else in the world! Especially since those stslls intentionally leave a gap, so we can spy on others as their peeing. That’s how important these genitals in bathrooms are! Gotta follow all the correct protocol for emptying your bladder!

I say all this to say that yesterday I peed on a tree outside, and nobody gives a shit.

As for your coworkers? Just make a concentrated effort to remember what they prefer as their gender so you don’t say “she” instead of “he”.

The only one that confuses me is “they”, but it’s still refering to just one person. Luckily I don’t know anyone like that, because that one I’m sure I’d constantly accidently fuck up.