Ok…PLEASE tell me you punched your little brother!!! How old was he?

Or! Or! Hear me out…wait until he gets married, and then at the wedding tell a funny story about how when he met his wife, he was also dating a prostitute with HIV, and kept it up for 4 years behind his wifes back. Play it off like a funny story, how he used to bareback the prostitute for free at noon, and then go on a date that night with his future wife. And by now, the whole room should be pindrop akwardly silent. Then you say “Yeah, Kenny! That’s for my PSP back in 2004, bitch!”

…doesn’t even matter if his name is Kenny. By this point you should be HAMMERED.