anarchiddy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 weeks ago
I’m attending the second funeral in as many weeks this weekend for very close childhood friends, and the thing that’s getting me is the grief of losing not just those friends, but loss and realization that I’m not even who I was when I knew them anymore
Like I’m kind of choking up now just thinking about it.
It’s been a rough month.
ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 2 weeks ago
I won’t be attending any funerals because everyone is all separated and split off to different parts of the province. But my generation of family is a huge community of first cousins and we all grew up together as kids and teenagers. We’re all within about a 7 / 8 year gap and we were close and knew one another - there was about 30 of us all together - our grandparents had huge families and then their children had huge families. Everyone grew up became adults with their own lives and we all went our own ways with about half staying home.
Whatever the situation … it’s a huge heartbreak for everyone including myself. It feels bad, it doesn’t feel good and there’s nothing you can do about it. You accept it … but it still doesn’t feel good.
I feel your pain because I’m going through the same thing. I don’t know what to say other than to reach out to those that were part of your circle that knew everyone and to be with your loved ones.
possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 2 weeks ago
I get they different people has different cultural ways but I think it would mean a lot of you came to a funeral just support your family members.
ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 2 weeks ago
I agree and it might be good advice for most people. But I’m a middle aged Indigenous Canadian that has lived a life of attending funerals from as far back as I can remember. My parents brought me to funerals of close relatives and friends from the time I was born. I’ve seen all kinds of funerals … elderly, adults, teenagers, children and babies … as well as single deaths or double or triple or quadruple deaths … I’ve seen open caskets and several closed caskets for mutilated bodies they couldn’t show … and deaths for all kinds of reasons - sudden, accidental, tragic, mysterious, murder and suicide
About a decade ago I couldn’t take it any more … I’ve seen enough and I don’t attend funerals any more. The only other funeral I plan on attending will be my own … and even then, I won’t be there any way.
I spend my time with the living when I can.