Comment on HELP! How do I help educate my son about his body when I know nothing about boys??
SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks agoAnd wait for an answer. Don’t just knock then immediately walk in. I’m nearly fifty and I’m still traumatized by this.
scsi@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
All the other replies tiptoeing around this - OP, your son has hormones raging in his body, he’s going to masturbate a lot. In my opinion and I’m going to be blunt, maybe focus on:
letting him know it’s normal for all this hormonal activity, masturbation is OK and not something to be frowned upon or ridiculed (well unless you two joke a lot which would be cool). In fact, as he starts to go out on dates gently suggest he rub one out before the date to calm his hormones the F down, which leads me to…
he’s gonna get boners all the time, it’s just a thing that comes with all those raging hormones. It can happen in unfortunate places and unfortunate circumstances (8th grade science class wearing stretchy shorts? SURE WHY NOT), so as a mom be aware this could be happening but he of course doesn’t want to say anything to you. Ignore or treat it as normal (or again, bust a joke if you’re tight like that).
teach him to respect his partners and not be just letting his hormones take over and he wants to stick his dick in everything. This is I feel something is missed on all “sex ed”, to me the biggest part is not the physical act but the negative emotional results if he lets those hormones take over. Hetero or gay doesn’t matter, it’s all the same - your partner has feelings and be aware (“don’t be an f’ing asshole”).
I’m of an age these days, but man I wish someone in an adult capacity had covered the above when I was a teenager. Instead, growing up with repressed catholic type parents it took me way, way too long to grasp the above on my own.
shasta@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
Yeah about that last point, it is easy to have sex with someone just because they also want it. However, you may regret it afterwards because maybe they want an actual relationship and you just wanted the sex because your hormones were making that decision for you. Or if you do it with a close friend, it can strain that relationship.
It’s always best to decide what you plan to do before going into any situation that could potentially turn sexual. And stick to the plan. If something unexpected comes up, try to find a way to step away for a few minutes, let the hormones cool, and try to decide what you really want. It’s the only way to be sure you’re making a decision based on more than the instinct to have sex with everything.
aeternum@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
I grew up in an entirely female family. I was literally the only boy. So I didnt get any sex talks from anyone. It sucked big time. I really really really wish someone had done it. I had no one to teach me about guy stuff.