CaptSatelliteJack

@CaptSatelliteJack@lemy.lol

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Someone tell frieren flat is justice.⁩ ⁨⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Mama didn’t raise no liar

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨What exactly are they teaching in our schools?⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  My brain autocorrected the first three I read. I felt like I was missing the punchline, so I started over to notice.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Favorite Racing Game Soundtrack?⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  While not a racing game in the traditional sense, the soundtrack for I Am Your Beast is what cocaine sounds like. Listen to Negative Time without vibing, I bet you can’t.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Me getting ready to deal with all the bungholes that exist outside of my basement⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Sometimes I go to the bathroom solely to wipe the sweat from my asscrack/taint. I call it Operation Sweaty Bunghole. This is the first and only time I’ve ever discussed it outside of my own mind.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨How do I make a phone call to (not from) an elevator speaker, just like what a debt collector once did?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  I was helping someone move and the elevator in the apartment received a call from “Walmart” saying they were trying to verify a charge for a PS5 Super Deluxe edition plus controller, and to give them a call back. Y’know the emergency call button in an elevator, and how it says when the light is flashing someone has answered the call? It was flashing. Very weird.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Introducing Battlefield Labs | Battlefield Studios⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  I know I’m late to the party, but have you tried battlebit? It actually is pretty good.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨You don't want to be sentenced to The Spire, right?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩:

  The Spire? Send me there, that I may Slay it by throwing my deck into the void and making it spontaneously explode.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Unshakable⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  C’mon, she’s just a kid!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨what was the last game you played in 2024?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Roboquest! I got my first completed run just in time!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Tell her⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Beat it too hard, like pounding a tent stake too far into the dirt

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨*Heart Racing*⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Me whenever my gf bends over to pick something up

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨pump up the jamz⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  The only correct answer is Excision and Downlink’s absolutely legendary Existence VIP

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨My little buddy (pack of 12)⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  I bet a few of your holes could accommodate two of these buddies

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨🧿👄🧿 y'all need to step up ur game⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩:

  Rhe most absolutely cursed thing I’ve ever posted in Teams was 👁 👄 👁 in the org main chat. The mouth is tilted 45°, all the emojis are huge, and weirdly animated. It was very funny.