Comment on Is my girlfriend gaslighting me?
TempermentalAnomaly@lemmy.world 2 months ago
You’re using rationality to defend your behavior instead of connecting emotionally around a fundamentally emotional issue. This doesn’t mean that her behavior was justified either, but rationality will only get you so far in solving this problem. Arguably, there’s an intimate and emotional reason you’re together. If you’re both not engaging in protecting and growing that first, then you’ll end in a you vs her situation.
BenFranklinsDick@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Girl is crazy and you’re telling him that him being RATIONAL is problematic? Get the fuck out of here.
Ookami38@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
It’s true enough advice, though. She has an emotional problem, not a rational one. She probably knows full well that her response isn’t rational, but she still feels the feelings she has. Explaining the rationale and logic she seems to be missing is only going to make her more upset. Versus, instead, figuring out what her actual problem is. Maybe it’s a long standing issue, having texts ignored. Maybe she has some past trauma, or something specific happened that day that just set them off.
It’s not always about being right or wrong. Her response, we all agree, was a wrong response. It’s one that I’d be considering the relationship for. But it’s also one to learn from, for all parties. Someone having a problem stemming from an emotion often isn’t going to be made better by logicing the situation into submission.
laughterlaughter@lemmy.world 2 months ago
People, it’s not this black and white either.
If you think issues in a relationship can be solved with logic/rationality only… good luck!