We have a cultural practice here in the states where we display dominance to our neighbors by carrying all of our groceries in one trip.

I’d look like a total bitch juggling and dropping everything from the car to the front door.

As it is right now, I deadlift my groceries and walk about 20 feet looking totally rad and dominant. I do this while loudly reminding my woman to “git” (which means something totally different from the git you’re used to) so the neighbors know that I’m a man’s man who doesn’t need any help from a female. That also shows her that I respect her weakness and don’t want her to get injured, which gets me laid later in the day. She rolls her eyes, but she knows how it is. This is why I have a pile of children by the way. All weak female children, but one day I will have a son and I will train him in the ways of his ancestors.

Everyone always listens for their neighbor’s car too so they can step outside to giggle while they struggle and drop their groceries. Of course we also gotta help the ladies whose men have abandoned them to deadlift groceries by themselves.