so like, all i can say is I’ve had conversations with my WASP mother about ableism. she’s an ableist fuck. she does not see it anywhere. trying to get her to see why putting the food that a slightest bit of cross-contamination will put me in the hospital right the fuck next to my dinner plate is not a microaggression but is in fact a macroaggression took years. Like, a fucking decade and we finally had to take it to a sparring ring and formally fight it out (we both have martial arts training but had until then never sparred each other. at the time i was skin, bones, and she had 70 pounds on me but i had a two belt advantage. healthy weight i have a 20 pound advantage. we agreed to throw real punches and kicks, we wore pads, went to 10 and i won by 5 points) and that was the only way i could get her to stop trying to poison me.

My point is: if it’s not a bigotry that affects you directly, most people miss it entirely. Very very few people are sensitive to bigotry as a theme.