what the fuck are you doing?

my dude

no

Speaking as the whitest dick I know, good tacos are fucking easy. You don’t have to do this to yourself. Hell, if you really don’t want to cook, jimmy dean sells a bag that you can throw in a skillet and then you just put that shit on a tortilla add cheese and you’re done.

Gods fuck.

ok. Go to the fucking grocery store and get some shit.

Get a tube of ground meat. It can be beef or turkey or sausage, don’t care, go with whatever you feel like, it will be delicious. Get a back of tater tots from the frozen section, this will be your potatoe. Get some pre-diced veg, onion and bellpepper. Cheese. A jar of diced garlic in oil. And here’s the secret bit: panko. Trust me.

One fucking pan. In goes the tots, they can defrost while you make yourself a stiff drink, I recommend a wellerman but you do you. When you start your second drink, drop the tube of meat in there and mix that bitch up. Add some of dat garlic, and if you think you’ve added too much, add just a bit more. Drink the second drink while you wait for that to cook, but don’t forget to stir it the entire time.

If you want to add extra seasonings or sauces for flavor, now’s the time. It’s good without, but you can add whatever you want to make it whatever you want. Depending on what I’m feeling, I’ll add Head Country seasoning with barbaque sauce. Essence of Emerils with spicy sauce is also good. There’s a greek seasoning mix that I like but can’t remember the name of that’s also good, but I haven’t found a sauce to pair with it yet.

When the meat is done, add the veg and panko.

The secret of the panko is that it soaks up the juices but stays crunchy. The juice is where the flavor is, and that juice will drip out of the taco if it’s not held in somehow. Panko. Magic from japan.

A little time and a little stirring later, turn the heat down and slap some of that mush on a tortilla, add some cheese, and eat that delicious shit.

There will be leftovers, and when you reheat some the next day, don’t do it in the microwave, whip that skillet back out and add an egg to that bitch!