My good sir,

I would like for you to double my previous order of sexual devices for I have decided that my bottom and my mouth should be filled in good order. I imagine you shall provide this alteration along with the free shipping for any order above the requisite amount due to this gaining you not only a significant sum more but perhaps a loyal customer.

I expect a response within a fortnight. If this is not provided I will send letters up the chain all the way up to Mr. Boyslutcloset if I must.

Good day sir,

SorryBookBroke