Okay I’m not sure if I’m gonna be able to answer your question, but I’ll explain what my reality is:

My reality is that I was not supposed to be born. I’m from the People’s Republic of China. My mother already gave birth to a child, my older brother, who btw, later becomes abusive to me. I was not supposed to be born, and the only reason why I even exist is because social security didn’t exist and my parents expect their children to take care of them when they get old, some “filial piety” shit. I was an “investment” to them, nothing more, not even a human, I’m a slave. Didn’t even have legal status until my “parents” gave the CCP a bribe (aka: a “fine”). Everything in the country was totally fucked. My older brother fights me all the time. Felt like 2 barn animals with the farm owner (aka: “parents”) not present most of the time, and there’s just fighting all the time.

In the US, I school went from 7 am to 6 pm because of afterschool programs and stuff. And then I had summer school. Its those run by Chinese-American “non-profit organizations” full with emotional abuse towards kids, not surprising, they’re just like my parents, an extention of them, the same “confucian” value of abusing children. The other kids, both Chinese Americans and also white and black kids, were all just against me. Zero solidarity. Nobody wanted to talk to me. Perhaps it had to do with my older brother fucking up my social skills. Anyways I get bullied a lot. Barely had any days off. Its just school for like 4 years straight in Brooklyn, NYC. And then if I was ever home, I’d get yelled at by my own parents instead. Literally zero safe haven. When I got to the city I’m in now, there are even less Asians in Elementary and Middle School that I get bullied even more. I was called a “ching chong” by both white and black classmates.

Then fastforward to highschool, I got unlawfully arrested by cops on dubious charges that never went anywhere, charges got dropped.

And then we got 2nd term trump threatening to deport me from the only country that I ever knew. And I’m also facing persecution by my previous country. I already said too much bad things about the CCP and Xi, I can never step foot in mainland China (or HK, Macau, for that matter) ever again. And on top of that, my parents and older brother all hate me.

This is the reality I have.

It it really wrong to just watch some movies, tv, anime, play some video games, etc? Is there anything wrong with just wanting to find some, even just a tiny bit of happiness of happiness from this bleak world? There are beautifuly crafted stories, and I want to enjoy them, I want to be immersed in a better world, even if its fake, to temporarily suppress the thoughts of enemies being EVERYWHERE. So please, don’t judge people, let them do whatever in peace, a little happiness a day can keep your mind from breaking under this fucked up world where everything is fucked up.