You don’t have to relationship with anyone if you don’t want that, I think your premise is wrong. I had an enjoyable run between long relationships, just very casual, by only going out with guys who said that was all they wanted, I can’t possibly be the only woman who likes those guys.

Now - when I said I was going to date more seriously (meaning I was wrapping up the casual run) I was shocked when most of them said “I’d like to date you” when I figured they were into variety and would NOT want to date anyone. i did not want to date any of them seriously at all. And kind of suspect they didn’t really want to date me either, more like they enjoyed the sex and thought maybe the rest would fall into place somehow?

So if you are doing that, don’t. Find the casual people, keep it casual and when they are ready to jump out, find someone else.

I will say, (and I think this is very usual) a “real” relationship does mean more regular sex. Sure, yes. But you ought not do that until or unless you are ready, and your partner too is ready, and enthusiastic about the idea. If you only see it as giving something up, not gaining more, I don’t think it’s time.

And no, you don’t cleave to each other exclusively! Have friends, go to work, have your own hobbies, be a whole person.