I also found the engagement rings really unsettling. The reason I find my example more worrying is because of the dissonance between humanization and dehumanization within the same action.

Say you were to replace an AI boyfriend with a real person in a cage, forcibly made to respond and shocked when giving a unsatisfactory response. If the user never became aware of this cruelty, they would perceive this change as an improvement (responses became more human). These users desperately argue that their AI boyfriends are processing emotion, love, and understanding like humans do, but continue to treat their boyfriends as sub-human.

Imagine if you had a partner who punished your undesirable behaviors by spiking you with amnesia-inducing drugs and training you to behave exactly how they want you to. Keep in mind that this has definitely happened to real people, and any decent person would identify the perpetrator as a criminal and abuser.

Terrifying.