I think it would be valuable to take a step back and look at how you’re thinking about women in general. This isn’t an attack FYI, I’m trying to be constructive because I totally understand your anxiety.

Firstly, lose the word “female.” Forget it. It won’t help you anywhere except biology class, and it’s a big red flag. In your brief question, your framing makes it sound like women are some mystical object that you can “get” with exactly the right words or the right amount of money. But they’re just people, and many of them are probably having similar issues talking to men. If you start to actively think about women as fully formed, independent, thinking, feeling human beings who have many of the same problems as you, and many that are quite different, then you’ll have a much easier time approaching them.

All of that is to say, empathy is critical. If you approach an interaction from a place of empathy—where you’re trying to understand the other person by listening to them and expressing interest—then it’ll slowly start to become natural. I realize that’s all easier said than done, but just thinking about women as complete people who aren’t there for you, but for themselves as individuals, would be a massive first step. Good luck.