Comment on Are mood problems a “turn off” for people even when they’re hard to manage?
CatDemons4@lemmings.world 2 weeks agoFriends 1 and 2 are usually kind of quiet. People spend time with Friend 1 because she’s a gamer who just emulates my behavior and “worships” me. Friend 2 is quiet and doesn’t seem to have many friends besides us. She seems usually sweet, though.
dnick@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
So it sounds like they may be emulating you for their own reasons. Amer can sometimes seem like strength even though it’s rarely even a primary emotion, just an output for a different emotion that is more difficult or embarrassing to express like fear or frustration.
I know you say you can’t help how you feel, but it might still be worth acknowledging that you recognize that it’s detrimental expression so you don’t drag them down. You may not be able to help it in the moment but that doesn’t mean you don’t recognize it afterwards and have the opportunity to acknowledge it.
On the other hand if you really think it’s justified and you shouldn’t have to apologize i would strongly encourage you to think of the analogy of someone doing the same thing but physically. If you went around kicking and punching everyone who you felt was weaker and needed ‘toughening up’, you might be just as justified, but could maybe understand why people would tend to shy away from you. Not everyone, some people like the abuse and some take shelter by being the bullies friend hoping they’ll be protected from the worst of it if they join in… And they desperately want friends too.