Let me guess: He was thwarted in his quest like a Scooby-Doo villain, and the cool Universal Monk showed him up, and everyone clapped.

Oh man, you didn’t even read it? I mean there’s recipe sharing, some singing, some laughs. I don’t wanna spoil it for you, but it does seem like a fun time had by all. Well, almost all. But you gotta admit, I do get accused of “main character syndrome” every day, so it really had to lead a story sooner are later, right?

You reacted to the community’s disapproval and requests for you to stop

The mods allow me to keep posting there, so I’ll keep posting there. In fact, posting some stuff there this morning!

doubling down and adopting a gleeful serial-killer energy

You mean, being friendly. Meh, easy to get confused about the two, I guess. But I do like your wording. Hey, are you a pulp-writer too?! Friend you gotta submit something to the Tales from the Cryptic Lemmy community! Come on, do it!

I’m completely serious that I’m concerned about you.

See that? I knew we were on the verge of being friends. I can feel it now—a friendship bubbling up from the depths like a long-buried secret, just waiting to explode! You’ve been holding it back, afraid to let it out, but guess what? It’s happening! You can’t stop it now. Hooray!

Excluding sleep and working, you’ve been averaging posting something on Lemmy every 9 minutes, every single hour of every single day for 2 months.

Prolific, right? Ya know, I’ve always felt a connection to those million-word-a-year men–the old pulp writers. They cranked out stories and words nonstop, and now here I am, doing the same! Just as underappreciated in my time as they were in theirs, but hey, quantity over quality, right?! I sorta feel like I am living my dream right now. Thank you for this shout-out!

You could have been accomplishing any number of projects with that, something you could be really proud of

But I am proud of my work on Lemmy. Thank you for your kind words. I’ve written two more stories that I am posting today and I’m posting some more articles today, so be sure to update your stats about me. Thanks friend!