HonkTonkWoman
@HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee
- Comment on Too soon? 1 week ago:
Big fan of this person, who looks like they died in the middle of birthing the three stooges…
- Comment on joyous skittering of the least-bird 1 week ago:
Same here! Billy Madison really fucked my perspective on penguin sizes. penguing
- Comment on Dog Vomit Slime Mold? 2 weeks ago:
Appreciate it!
- Submitted 2 weeks ago to mycology@mander.xyz | 4 comments
- Comment on Possible snipers seen at OSU. Administration says they're not snipers but should be treated like they are. 3 weeks ago:
“These are not weapons trained at your precious little foreheads, they’re Democracy Spreaders™’. You go to class & learn all about democracy & when you exit the building, we use these to spread all that democracy stored up in your brains all over the wall behind you.“
- Comment on It's time to let go 3 weeks ago:
I still have a FireWire 400 to DV cable.
I no longer have a DV Camera or a FireWire 400 port, but I’m keeping that damn cable.
- Comment on I wish to give this many fucks 4 weeks ago:
Ah, I see you know your combustion well.
- Comment on Tennessee legislature passes bill banning marriage between first cousins 5 weeks ago:
I love how the pic for the article is, presumably, a lesbian couple…
Yep, all those hot & steamy incestuous lesbians in Tennessee are about to riot.
- Comment on At least they're not yeeting a baby at it 5 weeks ago:
It means exactly what you’re afraid it means… US Southerners have a strange desire to expose their genitalia in public settings.
- Comment on At least they're not yeeting a baby at it 5 weeks ago:
Way too many clothes for Florida, much less the southern United States, just entirely too many clothes altogether.
The distinct lack of a visible tallywhacker should lead most to correctly assume this image is, in fact, artificially intelligent. If that trait is not as obvious, maybe the absence of alligators & crystal meth will serve as triggers to unlocking this truth.
- Comment on C O L O N I Z E 5 weeks ago:
Toilet mushrooms go great with crotch fries, they really bring out that tanginess.
- Comment on Circuit board earrings 1 month ago:
This is just a guess, but maybe use a jigsaw to generalize a shape & rotary tool to fine tune it?
- Comment on Hatzegopteryx 2 months ago:
- Comment on New recipe! 2 months ago:
Tweefies
- Comment on I don't think this needs explaining 2 months ago:
I’ve heard that cooking shrimp with tails still encased in their shells helps preserve flavor, but I’ve never heard of anyone actually eating the shell.
I just pick the end of the shell off the tail before wasting the whole thing.
- Comment on When it’s Saturday and there’s no new content on lemmy 2 months ago:
Not fast enough. Eat some raisins.
- Comment on Hate it when flippers buyout limited drops.... 2 months ago:
- Comment on Do you believe in life after love? 2 months ago:
Ooh! Now do Gouda with Goose from Top Gun and Brenda from 90210.
- Comment on What is this? 2 months ago:
Microwave it?
- Comment on Your meal has been delivered 2 months ago:
Kinda looks like that picture was taken from inside a jello mold, looking out.
I think I can see a grape.
- Comment on My pick is Rubberband Man by the Spinners. 3 months ago:
“When they found Clarence Thomas in the meat truck, he was frozen so stiff it took them two days to thaw him out for the autopsy…”
- Comment on Open your eyes! 3 months ago:
SHAVE ‘EM OFF!!! SHAVE. THEM. OFFFFFF.
Eyelids are nothing but ocular foreskin standing between you and skinless holiness.
- Comment on Pride flags make rainbows straight 3 months ago:
Doctors recommend finding a bottom or a generous top. In extreme cases, both may be necessary.
- Comment on His true endgame 3 months ago:
Bezos & Musk came along with some superglue shortly after.
I believe there’s still roughly $7.66 out there, but bring a scraper.
- Comment on McFindOut 5 months ago:
It’s late September in nowhere important. Weather’s gone stale. It’s humid, outright sticky.
The local chucklefucks lost their big homecoming chucklefuck match and the world feels a little bit smaller right now.
Around 2:30am, the 24 hour McD’s that sits on the edge of town has turned into its weekly staggering, stinking mess.
Someone’s drinking that orange hi-C mess like diabetes is a myth. Unfortunately they forgot they puked in the parking lot & that scope does not mix well with Orange Hi-C.
They pass by on the way to bathroom, burping up a minty bouquet with notes of Malibu, SoCo, Busch Light, & Blackberry Mad Dog 20/20.
Someone else has fallen asleep while ordering at the only functioning kiosk.
Someone else is adding food to the sleeper’s order…
And then there’s McKayakeleigyh….
She just wants a fuckin’ McFlursh with MMMMs.
She’s been sayin as much for the last thirty minutes. She already ate her nuggets and now she cain’t leave without mcflurrsshy.
As the manager informs our hero, for the 7th time, that the McFlurry machine is broken, McKayakeleigyh interjects:
“fuckin’ feeiixit”
“It’s broken, it needs a ne…”
“ffffFffFFFFFEEEEUUUHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIXXXXXXTTT”
The manager clutches desperately for the storewide channel currently open on the shoulder mic…
“schkkt You’ve prepared for this. Trust your training… CODE VIRAL!!! WE GOIN VIRAL Y’ALL!!!… ARCH. UP. BITCHES.”
- Comment on Very powerful video card! 5 months ago:
It’s the only way to watch Oppenheimer exactly as Nolan intended.
- Comment on Let's all be thankful. 5 months ago:
- Comment on Best of both worlds 6 months ago:
Long time ago there was a drawing of a cat, mapping out the different portions of a cat, like a butcher’s diagram, but…
The cat had an S-Video port for a butthole.
I don’t know why it had an s-video poopchute & I can’t seem to locate the image, but…
If you google “cat with s-video butt” the Animaniacs logo is a top result.
For some reason, that seems fitting.
- Comment on Think anyone would notice? 6 months ago:
And don’t forget, these aren’t normal gators…
These are meth-fueled Florida gators who are as likely to ban books as they are maul a skier.
The Alps won’t know what hit ‘em.
- Comment on Those were the days! 7 months ago:
Aww, I thought they were blowing bubbles. Looked like fun.