In spite of my desire to have him stay in the Maine Senate race just to see how much he could fuck up his chances, Graham Platner officially dropped out. And now Leftists want us to forget some of their progressive superstars backed him so they can move on to other things, like choosing a replacement and/or blaming Donald Trump for Platner’s downfall.

So, that’s it, right?

Not so much. Graham Platner may have gone the way of any coherent thought in Queen Kamala the Appointed’s brain, but the damage he’s caused is going to resonate for quite a while, and the Left doesn’t even realize it yet. To be fair, they might not realize it after they read this piece, so there’s that.

The first problem the Left faces PP (Post-Platner) is optics. Our favorite oyster farmer with a Nazi tattoo managed to get a lot of high-profile progressives on his side. Bernie “Fight the Oligarchy, But Not Me” Sanders, Elizabeth “Chief Running Mouth” Warren, Ro “Yer Boat” Khanna, Ruben “Not Cool Enough For a Nickname” Gallego, and many others. The Left may try to memoryhole this, but the Internet is forever and it’s undefeated. The pictures, the statements, the videos, the tweets (or Xs if you prefer), and all of that will be around for a while and dog these assholes for a long time.

Not to mention, it gives the GOP campaign ad fodder for the midterms, the 2028 Presidential election, and any time these nozzleheads try to stick their heads out of their asses to support another candidate. I can see the ad copy now…

[Insert name of Leftist who supported Platner] wants to run for [insert name of office]. This is the same person who didn’t see anything wrong with an accused rapist with a Nazi tattoo before withdrawing support. Is this the kind of person you want representing you?

By the way, if there are any Republicans looking for someone to write ad copy, give a brother a hook up!

That means let me have a job. I’m not sure how hip Republican leadership is these days, so I figured I’d better explain it.

And then there’s the scramble to find a new candidate to run against Susan “I Totally Didn’t Get That Last Reference” Collins. The Democrats are on the clock to find someone to replace Platner, and…how can I put this delicately…the pickings are slimmer than Kate Moss on Ozempic. The recent debate with the 8 contenders made a carnival freak show look Amish. One had a brain freeze rivaling President Brick Tamland, another has a past that rivals Platner, and one was just…yeah, I’m not going there.

Remember, kids, these are the candidates Maine Democrats think would be better than a guy with a literal Nazi tattoo and multiple sexual assault allegations.

Which brings us to the Left’s attitude towards sexual assault. Sure, they hate it when it comes to allegations about Donald Trump, but with Platner? Apparently their limit on such allegations is 10 because they didn’t try to flush his ass (which I understand he might enjoy) until the 11th accusation, this time from a Democrat supporter with a story flimsier than E. Jean Carroll’s.

But up until then, they were all sweeping for Platner.

Now, tell me how that gives them any credibility on sexual assault going forward. Let me save you some breath and brain power: it doesn’t. It shows you’re willing to let women be victims if a politician has the “right” political positions. Of course, anyone who was around when these same asshats were sweeping for Bill Clinton could see history repeating itself. But, yeah, keep telling us about how Donald Trump is a rapist.

The biggest takeaway from the Platner implosion is just how scared the Left is by the rise of the Democratic Socialists of America from their even further left flank. DSA members are running and mostly winning seats that would have been Democrat cakewalks in previous years. This shows me there’s a civil war brewing on the Left and the more mainstream Leftists aren’t ready for it. And let me just say the DSA would be perfectly fine with a Platner-esque candidate if it meant getting rid of a Democrat do-nothing.

So even though Graham Platner is gone, his impact is going to be felt for a long time. Meanwhile, I would invest heavily in popcorn futures.