I also know there is a script you can set up which will handle the initial contact to federate automatically.

I tried finding such a script but had no luck. I was able to export my subscription list from sh.itjust.works and imported it on my instance.

I had to unsubscribe and resubscribe as I was experiencing the ‘Subscribe Pending’ issue but after a little while things seemed to start evening out and becoming a bit more stable.