I’m wasn’t implying that you shouldn’t host it yourself at all. Just maybe use a VPS for hosting it yourself.

Getting buy in on the family & friends aspect is being able to match or exceed the popular free services. If there’s a perception that it’s not reliable then it’s highly unlikely they’ll keep using it. So the last thing you want is to have something happen to your internet connection, NAS, etc. At the end of the day it’s the pesky perception equals reality thing that dooms things like this and tanks the spouse approval factor.