I also really hate the meme of nerds not having sex or relationships. I’m a software dev that works with the nerdiest people I’ve ever met. The vast majority of my coworkers are married or in long term relationships. I’m active in the kink community and have a number of coworkers I see there too. My experience is that nerds are very common in the kink community. I mostly date and fuck fellow nerds and as far as I can tell, they’re mostly doing alright, too.

The stereotype from the meme is just self deprecation bordering on toxicity and incel-ness. The only place where “nerd” is still an insult or bad thing is in Disney channel movies, which are eternally stuck in 90s stereotypes, where people nerds are supposed to remove their glasses and let their hair down if they want to be found hot (ps: that is a terrible trope, because glasses are extremely hot).