shin megami tensei 4 might tick a lot of those boxes

• character building not really a focus, you can get away with putting minimal thought into that
• not really terribly grindy
• i didnt end up using items much when i played it
• there is turn based combat but its got an interesting system for it and battles tend to be pretty quick
• the first part of the game is particularly brutal and while i wouldnt say youre ever op once youre past it its not nearly as bad
• it does have loot tho, scavaging from the various above ground areas is basically the only way to get money

honestly biggest issues id say are that brutal first few hours and the fact that its forever entombed on the 3ds, its got a primo rpg storyline though i dont generally have a high tolerance for jrpg stuff either but i was basically able to immediately click with this one and didnt really have any issues at any point