I know a woman who accused her girlfriend of abuse and cut contact with her. The one who was accused told all of us she was sorry, she didn’t realise she was abusive, and she wanted to know how she did it, so she could work on improving as a person. A few of us asked the accuser how she was abused, and… Nothing. She can’t say. I don’t know if she can’t or doesn’t want to or both, but that accusation fucked with that girl and gave her PTSD. And I’m never again going to treat that ‘victim’ like I believe her. Too many people doing that.