People's MOTIVES and some dynamics in RELATIONSHIPS
The BRAIN can read a current person as a threat based on past experiences and relationships. It can recognize the behaviors of individuals that were acting with malice and forethought and identifying some current people as THE SAME. However, it does not always mean the current person acting this way has THE SAME malice and forethought as that past person or other past people did.
It is just so TOUGH nowadays with any relationships because people are seeming to only be motivated out of self-interest. That many just DO NOT CARE about other people, only what they can get out of other people.
Statements I've heard such as: “I'd like to be his (Corey Taylor's) ex-wife some day” have this type of materialistic ideology. Even said jokingly (if it was) shows me that many ARE just self-interested. That their idea of “happiness” lies in material wealth and goods.
A HUGE DISTINCTION: some may act 100% one-sided, but it's SO NOT INTENTIONAL. I made the mistake of treating these situations as other past toxic situations but one thing I left out: THERE IS A LEARNING PROBLEM involved that produces this behavior. It matches up all one-sided but again it is SO UNINTENTIONAL. That's the difference!
These situations cannot work either way, though. There is a recognition of the behavior, but it still makes the dynamic unworkable. I need to be heard too, and other people that are participating need to recognize that. It cannot work if the dynamic is always one-sided. People need reciprocity. Some are just incapable of it, even though their intentions are essentionally good.